I always feel like I got things figured out and I know who I am. Turns out I’m learning every day about who I am and what the people in my life really mean to me. Each day I feel just a little bit more. I’ve realized what I think is best isn’t really whats always best for me. I may know what I want to do with my life and how I want to live it. But when it comes to people that come into your life.. I got no god damn clue why I feel what I feel for certain people and not feel for as strong for others. I hold on to those that don’t really care much for me, hoping they will come back. And i don’t hold on tightly for those who care soo much for me. I’ve realized how stupid i’ve been; when something bad happens to loved ones who care for me so much and I’ve been there not giving the same amount. I’m only human though. I do get blinded and sometimes don’t see whats most important. I always tell myself and others to let go of those who dont care for you anymore and move on. I know you want them back but its the person in those good memories that you want back. Understand that not everyone is meant to stay forever. Some are only meant to play there part. I tell myself this and I so strongly believe in it but even I like to hold on sometimes. It’s hard to let go of someone that gave you so much to remember. But I am thankful that these people have come into my life and made me happy in those moments. And hey, maybe its not over, maybe I will cross paths with them again, but I will not dwell or try so hard anymore because I am missing out on my life and the great people who care to be in it right now. My sister and my cousin, have both been diagnosed with breast cancer. Every time someone brings them up or talks about breast cancer I burst into tears. I can’t help it. They are my heros. I love them so much. And my girl friend has stuck by me even when I’ve messed up and lost my way. These are the people that truly deserve me right now. And i’m going to give them all I’ve got.